Thursday, April 22, 2010

decisions, decisions.

I feel like i should paint tonight. I have been in a funk. Lately ive been painting what i feel and its been fast and messy and ever changing. I need to make decisions about my painting and about my life. One thing that is really exciting is that my painting and my personal life are directly affected by one another. My paintings changed a month ago (dramatically switched from oil on panel to acrylic washes on paper), and less than two weeks after that happened i broke up with my boyfriend of three years. There was nothing wrong with either thing--the oil paint or the boyfriend. In fact, i was pretty good at both or am pretty good at both. I just cant force things anymore. My paintings might look stupid right now and my life might look stupid right now, but it feels right. They both feel like things i need to do, even if they dont make sense whatsoever.

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